25 Thoughts To Keep You Busy While In The Shower #2
Here they are, 25 loose thoughts you might have while carrying out a routine task like showering, driving, or daydreaming:
25. People love picking on millennials until their computers need to be fixed.
24. Now that there aren’t smoking and non smoking sections in restaurants they should change it to children and non children sections.
23. As a kid, I loved zoos because I loved animals. As an adult, I hate zoos because I love animals.
22. If I was kidnapped and had my mouth duct taped, I would most likely die because my nose is clogged 90% of the time.
21. I would never steal a credit card and use it to pay for stuff, because I’m sure I would not get away with it, but I am scared of people stealing my credit card and using it to pay for stuff, because I’m sure they would get away with it.
20. The older I get, the more concerned I am that every new ache and pain is going to be permanent.
19. Go jogging at 5am and your neighbors think you are an early-riser health nut who probably has to get to work early. Go jogging at 3am and they think you are a sketchy tweaker who probably doesn’t have a job.
18. Emma Stone is what Lindsey Lohan could have been.
17. Making friends would be a lot easier if it was socially acceptable to ask, “wanna be friends?” at any age.
16. I can barely keep the same ‘writing voice’ across my university essays and reports, yet Wikipedia, edited by millions, reads like it was written by one person.
15. My dog’s memory lives on through my login passwords.
14. Does my dog know I am actually driving the car, or does she think I am just riding along as well?
13. My parents are slightly more closely related to chimps than I am.
12. If I see someone walking the street alone at night, I automatically assume they’re up to something shady. If I see that same person walking with a dog, I automatically assume they’re more trustworthy than an average person.
11. The thing I miss most about childhood is being more excited for something fun happening the next day than I was to sleep that night.
10. Kids always want to “help” when they are very little, but as soon as they are old enough to really help, they stop wanting to.
9. If my behavior in video games is any indicator, I should be freakishly comfortable with looting things off of dead bodies.
8. A few decades ago people advertised their food as tasty and fresh. Today, they’re just trying to convince you that it’s real.
7. People who press “Camera” when changing a profile picture must be pretty damn confident.
6. It is very noble of magicians to not use their powers for evil, and instead use them for children’s birthday parties.
5. The real walk of shame is when you take all the cups and plates you’ve been hoarding all weekend down to the kitchen.
4. People who built the pyramids were given shelter, food and compensation. If they were considered slaves, you are a slave too.
3. Last night my friend asked to use a USB port to charge his cigarette, but I was using it to charge my book. The future is stupid.
2. Vehicles today can surf the web, link to your phone, stream music and videos, etc.. but they still can’t perform a simple database lookup to tell you what the check engine light is on for.
1. Taxes are like a subscription to your country that you can’t cancel, no matter how bad the service gets.